Dating over 40…how it all started

So, I’ve been doing this online dating stuff. It’s been, er, interesting to say the least. I think I’m going to start doing weekly dating updates. For one reason I think eventually I’m going to need to visually see some progress, cause right now I’m not feeling it. Second, I think someone out there might be able to benefit from my experience, and honestly, I hope you do, I would hate to think I’m subjecting myself to this for only selfish reasons. Thirdly, some of this shit is downright funny…and I use the word funny loosely.

In an effort for everyone to be on the same page, I’ll tell you where I came from. Well not WHERE, I mean just where I came from as far as dating. Although my WHERE story is pretty interesting too…but this here is going to be how I got to this exact point in my dating life. I will share what I have learned, what I haven’t learned, and where I am headed…Hopefully this weekly update will end with some good news, but I know that it will definitely be entertaining. Anyway, here it goes…

My very first boyfriend was Javier. It was during our short stay in Mexico…again, interesting story. I was in 1st grade, he was in 2nd. He was the ONLY older “man” I ever dated. We would hold hands, and we would kiss (nothing vulgar so get your dirty mind out of the gutter) and his brothers just knew we would be together forever. Then we moved back to the states, and I never heard from Javier again.

In 5th grade my BFF’s younger brother had a major crush on me. I think we kissed too. Nothing really ever came of it, he was a bit of a player then. However his crush never faded for me, and he proclaimed this too me after HS and before he completely went nuts and killed himself.

If my memory serves me, I didn’t have another BF until I was a freshman in HS, he was in 8th grade. We did a lot of making out….and he was horrible. He was quite the slobbery kisser, ew. I mean ‘give me a towel’ kind of slobber. Gives me creepy shivers just thinking about it…Ugh. A few years later he tried to “get back” with me, I was not interested. That was the first time I realized guys think that once they’ve had you, they can have you whenever they want. **LESSON**

The next one that I remember was when I was 16. He was 15 and went to an all boys school. We met through a mutual friend. Seriously, even then, I don’t know what it was that attracted me to him. He was kind of a tool, and I eventually realized that he had some serious “issues”…but I’ll leave that out. We dated nearly two whole years. Off and on…This was the boy I gave up my virginity for. I was 17 he was 16, it was in the back of his parents van parked 2 blocks from his house, and one block from my grandmother. I’m not proud. I can only hope, as a mother, neither of my kids have the same experience. Anyway, eventually we broke up for good, but not after he cheated on me, and my friend and I spray painted his car. That’s not a confession btw, just in case someone wants to get me in trouble for something that happened 26 years ago where the only ‘victim’ was an old ugly car.

I’m going to end my pathetic dating history pre divorce with my last BF as a student. I was a Senior, he was a Junior. He was tall, good looking, popular and on the wrestling team. Quite good too as I remember…He gave it all up to spend as much time with me as he could. Well, that’s what he told me anyway, I think he was just an idiot who didn’t like school…but at the time, it seemed very romantic. I’m going to sum up our 3 year relationship as quickly as possible. He was a TRAIN WRECK. Our relationship was near perfect, until we had sex, and he realized I was NOT a virgin. **LESSON** Men like to think they are your first…no matter how old you are. There were other issues of course…He cheated, I cheated, he’s a drunk and a loser…and eventually I got out.

Next time we’ll go over the “men” after HS, my husband and the lessons I’ve learned about all of these relationships. Not the least of which is that I have always liked to date younger men, still do. There are a few other lessons I’ve learned about myself, the men I was drawn to and the reasons behind it. BUT before I get to all of that, there are a few more relationships to cover…I bet you can’t wait.


4 thoughts on “Dating over 40…how it all started

  1. Ah, online dating. I’ve done my fair share of that. Some good dates and some bad ones, but overall I’ve had a good experience with it.

    My dating history doesn’t go back as far as you. In fact, the first girl I really ever got involved with was when I was a senior in HS. I guess you could say I was a late bloomer (and extremely shy). Since then though I’ve gotten married so I don’t have to worry about the dating scene anymore.

  2. Dawn, I’m really enjoying your blog! I’m feeling you sister…. Thanks for pointing out the lessons!!! I needed them articulated very simply. It’s time I get ’em. The irritation is I’m attracted to younger men too… they to me… Where does go? Can’t wait to read more.

    1. I am super glad to know you ‘get’ this. There are lessons in everything…I’m now trying to get what some of them are, before it’s too late! As for the younger men thing…I will not make excuses (hee hee).

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